Hannah Miller
Style
Academy and Reflection for my Rhetorical Analysis Paper
The
Style Academy lesson I did was the absolute phrases lesson because it helped
get more information into one sentence. Applying this lesson into my writing
and using it in the revision process helped my sentences become more
informative and clearer. I tried to put more information into each sentence
with out making it so long that it would be too difficult to read or
understand.
For example, I applied this to my
thesis so that I could combine all my thoughts into one sentence using coordinating
conjunctions and taking out the “be” verb to instead using participial verbs to
complete the phrases. This my thesis from the first draft: “President Obama had a far more effective speech than
President Reagan. Obama’s use of humility, personal stories, and emotional and
logical appeal reach a far broader primary and secondary audience than Reagan
does in his far narrower minded speech.” I rewrote this many times, but this is
how it looks after applying this lesson to my thesis
“Although
both speeches were about religion in politics, President Obama had a far more
effective speech than President Reagan because Obama’s use of humility and
personal stories, statistical evidence, and emotional and logical appeal
reaches out and invites the action of tolerance to a far broader primary and
secondary audience than Reagan does in his narrower minded speech.”
After
applying this lesson to my thesis statement and many other sentences in my
paper, I found that it was much more comprehensive. My sentences flow, and the
paper as a whole feels easier to read.